There was an interesting video going around recently about “overfunctioning GMs.” It was tied to prep, IIRC, but the basic point I took pretty broadly – some GMs take on a very heavy percentage of the emotional work associated with making sure the session goes well. (Like me!)

Two things come to mind – one, I suspect this pattern is learned pretty early on; you mention narcissism, but having a narcissist parent makes overfunctioning into a survival skill.

The other thing is that the success of a gaming session has so many factors that it’s essentially gambling. The state of the campaign, where the players’ heads are at, where your head is at, the pacing of events as they emerge organically relative to the pacing needs of a session, etc. If failure (or even, anything less than greatness) implies unbearable or dangerous levels of vulnerability, then it can really turn you into knots trying to control for it.

Being one’s own worst critic is sometimes about preempting attack.